After searching the internet and having my search team doing overtime. Paula Niua of Paramata Eels did not exist. He'd just got an iPhone so I messaged him and said so are you really a rugby player? I then facetimed him and asked him. The look on his face proved he was a gob shite. God love him. Trying to impress me he said. He was gutted and said he understood if I didn't want to be with him anymore. "Don't be daft!!! I think its hilarious!"
We were in a hotel. We'd met up after work on the Friday evening. "My Sisters just text to see if we want to go out with them tonight for Amelia's Birthday?" "Yeah ok then" I said petrified. I was excited too. This is getting serious I thought. We got ready and went to get the bus. At the bus stop his sister and niece was there. I didn't feel as worried about tonight as I'd already got to meet them. So so lovely:) and what a gorgeous little girl! She was going to her Ballet class. There she was in her little leotard and tutu. We went to Bondi Junction and I rummaged the shops for something to wear and we got Amelia a little Birthday present. We then went onto Bondi Food Markets. We both had Dim Sum. Absolute yummo!! We had another night booked at the hotel. Perouse Lodge in Randwick, The Spot. It was difficult as Paul lived with his Sister, Brother in-law and Niece and I was a live in Nanny. Hotels were the only option but they were very pricy. We went back to the hotel and started to get ready. Off we went to Coogee Pavilion for drinks and a meal. Tongan's LOVE a good feed and really I was already Tongan. They ordered loads of different pizzas and other dishes and at one point I had three Corona's next to me. I felt loved already and Amelia took to me right away. She wanted to sit next to me. WINNING! What a gorgeous little family. I was loving the company. I tried to pay for what I had and they wouldn't take the money. "Thank you so so much!" I can't even explain the Tongan Culture. It's just gorgeous and I'm still learning and can't wait to go over for a holiday and to meet my extended family in person rather than just on FaceTime. Paul met my Mam and Dad a couple of weeks before (on FaceTime of course). He couldn't understand a word my Dad said. I don't half the time. A Manc with a Cumbria accent. Difficult. He took the phone from me and spoke to my Mam. What a gentleman. He was so frightened but clearly wanted to impress. Me and Paul carried on the night and waltzed over to Coogee Bay for a dance. Paul seemed to be in a weird mood and wandered off dancing with every Tom, Dick and Harry and I was just left stood watching. I was like, hmmmm, this is weird. A guy came over to me. Jeeeez I attract them. He was off it, like so so drunk. Staggering and slurring his words at me. Paul decided to come over and the guy soon left me alone. Paul went back off and danced. Ohhhh here we go...... stupid fucking anxiety kicking in. I was all hot a clammy and went and got some fresh air outside. I could barely breathe. Full on attack. Paul soon followed "Whats wrong?" he said. I could hardly talk. "I'm just gonna go back to the hotel" "Tell me whats wrong" he said worryingly. "I'm just gonna go back" I said still out of breath. He got me in a taxi and came with me. We didn't speak a single word. We got back to the room and he said "Are you going to tell me whats wrong" With his hands on my shoulders. Eventually I was able to speak. "I've had an attack" He thought I'd been attacked. Trying to explain to him something he had no idea about or no idea of why it happened was very hard. I went and got in the shower as I was actually soaked. Even I was shocked with that one. They've never been that bad! I still don't really know what brought it on. I'm thinking insecurity from the past. I think I thought he was going to go off with someone else. Leave me after he'd just introduced me to his family. I got out the shower and got into bed. We both just lay there in darkness on our backs looking up and the ceiling. He was probs asking himself what the fuck had just happened. He rolled on top of me and said "Tell me whats wrong" I said "I can't" "Why" "I just can't, its too soon" "Tell me!!" he said. I giggled a while, took some deep breaths and whispered in his ear......... "I love you" Right away he lent up looked right at me (my eyes had gotten used to the darkness so I could see him) and said "I love you too!" We just laughed and had the biggest hug. Right away a felt the weight of the world lift off my shoulders. I was content.
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