So....... The whole Family are sat round at my Grandma's, the eve of her funeral. Paul messages me. The post office have called him to say his documents are there and ready to collect. He'll ring me when he gets them. 10.30am his time and our 22.30. WhatsApp Video call. I can't even remember what he said now. I was numb. "Send me screen shots" I said. 'Your human rights claim in an application for entry clearance made on 15/03/2019 is refused'. That's all I could read. Is this some kind of sick joke. Paul's face. If only I could hug him right now. The numbness only became stronger. My brother took my phone off me and read through the reasons why. "WOW" he said. "What, tell me what!" I was frantic. "Shut up and let me sink this in then I'll explain" I felt shit. He was only trying to help. "Right" he said. Then explained everything. So here goes- He met eligibility for our relationship and eligibility for the English test. He passed on everything that was needed but the financial side. With a spouse visa you need to have a sponsor and with that I was to sponsor him but because I didn't earn the £18,600 per year I couldn't so my Dad would as third party. We had spoken to a retired immigration agent previous and she said that was fine. So we went ahead and did so. Because Paul had wrote a cover letter saying myself and Milla would be cared for by my parents and living in their home he knew we would be safe. He also said that he would worry about not being in Milla's life and her growing up without him and that she needed stability and believes a family should not be torn apart. My Dad also wrote a cover letter stating that me and Milla would live in his family home and we would be cared for until Paul came back and was able to work. This has gone against us. Another reason to the visa being refused was- 'Based on the information you have provided we have decided that there are no such exceptional circumstances in your case.' So basically if me and Milla were living on the streets they would consider that as exceptional. And breath........... I'll let you take that in too. It gets worse- 'We have reached this decision because you have demonstrated your sponsor and child is being financially supported by her parents, moreover you have noted about the separation between you and your child. I note you are a non-visa national and your wife is able to travel too. I further note you are able to keep in contact via social media and other means. Through this you can still exercise a family life with your sponsor and child. I am not satisfied a refusal would result in unjustifiably harsh consequences for you, your sponsor or any other family member. There are no exceptional circumstances in your case.' WOW (now I know what part my brother was reading.) It took me days to read through the reasons for refusal. It still baffles me. "A social media relationship" FUCK ME! Who was this decision maker. A robot? Someone with no soul. No humanity? No children? God forbid me for not falling in love with a British citizen! How criminal. So yeah. That's basically it. We decided we were going to appeal. We would talk about this another day. Tonight and tomorrow were about Grandma. We called Paul back and reassured him. "Thank you Jonathan" We were all so upset. He was helpless and there was nothing we could do right now.
The next day was a very sad one. We all had heavy hearts. What a beautiful send off for our head of the family. We all miss her terribly.
Later that day we were back at her wonderful home and Jonathan said call the Immigration Agent. He'd been looking for them the night before. I can't remember if I've said previously but we didn't pay for one when applying for Paul's visa (we won't be doing that again). I called one up in Manchester. I got an appointment for the very next day at 15.00. Perfect!
Me and Dad drove through. We went to a little office (this agent was recommended on the government website so we knew she was legit). She asked the situation (I've gotten really good at telling a very long story in approximately 7 seconds). I showed her the screen shots of the visa. "Right ok. You (she pointed to me) need to go and get a new job. You need to make at least £18,600 per year. Paul can't apply for another visa until you can prove this wage with 6months of wage slips." Shocked but surprisingly calm I was. Dad was a mess. He asked so many questions. "Can we appeal?" "I'm going to be honest with you . You could, but you might get a really nice judge that day in court with some humanity who will feel sorry for you BUT he still has to obey by the rules. It can also take up to a year for an appeal to even happen" Basically the government changed the rules (they do this quite often) 4-5 years ago. You were able to have a third party sponsor on a spouse visa but now the sponsor has to be the spouse. I have to go and find another job earning this amount or more. That means going full time and leaving my baby girl. Obviously its not what I want to do but I am prepared to do anything to get our family back together. Paul can come over on another visitor visa (6 months). We have to get the timing right because we are going to use this Immigration Agent (£650) to fill in the visa application with me and Paul present. So I got a new job only yesterday morning. Working as a carer in the community. I am absolutely devastated to have to leave a job that I truly love and to leave such an amazing team. I will miss you Swain Fam💚 but I am also really excited for a new adventure. My first wage slip will be the end of August. My sixth wage slip will be the end of January. So Paul will come over the middle of August and leave again the middle of February. He has to be out of the country to apply for a visa. We will fast track it this time which will give us a quicker decision but will also cost us £500. We have lost all the money for that application and Paul will have to start a fresh one. Our immigration agent will go through it all with Paul while he is here in this country and scan all his documents which get uploaded onto the system which is better then sending all the forms off and costing us more money (another new change in the system thats just came in in the last couple of weeks).
So thats where we are up to now. This country has failed me and my family. This whole situation has effected so many people on so many levels. I'm going to be honest (thats what this is about) I had to give in and go to the doctors last week. A good friend said to me if you had a chest infection you'd go and get antibiotics. If you had a water infection, you'd go and get antibiotics. So class anti-depressants as antibiotics. You have an infected brain so take antibiotics. They are slowly kicking in. They aren't forever but I have suffered for longer than I should have and I needed the help and there is absolutely no harm in asking for help. We all need to. And you know what, it makes you feel so much better just talking about it. For anyone reading this and wants to talk, please do. I'm always here. What I said to the doctor was (as I got very upset and promised myself I wouldn't) that if Paul was here this wouldn't be happening. My mental and physical health wouldn't be affected and I wouldn't be costing the NHS. By Paul not being here it is costing the government more money as because he is out of the country I'm classed as a single parent and I'm entitled to universal credits. More fool them.
Fingers crossed my next post will be Paul💙
Thursday, July 11, 2019
Sunday, July 7, 2019
Bloody hell what a farce
He got to Tonga. He made the epic journey in 35hours. He was there 6weeks before he submitted the visa. We just wanted to get it right. A Family Settlement Visa and my Dad would be sponsoring him as his Spouse (me) didn't earn the £18,600 per year. There are lots of different rules to the different type of visas. It completely fucks with your head. Mainly they want money out of you. I wouldn't even say they were protecting our country. I have no idea in what the logic is behind our system. Personally I think its a load of bull shit!
His Visa was done and submitted online on the 21st March. £1,300 it cost. He then had to make an appointment for Fiji Uk Embassy as that was the closest one to Tonga. He did that, then I booked him a flight. He would stay with family for two nights. $600 for a return flight which took 2 hours to get there. Off he went. He had already filled in his paper visa and collected all evidence. Marriage certificate, birth certificates, cover letters, proof of address, employment contract, the list goes on. He had a file full and all the evidence and the evidence for my Dad to sponsor him. Utility bills, proof of earnings etc. He then had to do his Biometrics (photo and finger prints). He was in that appointment 10 minutes!! All this money and effort for a 10minute appointment! Ridiculous. The guy said right well I'll get all this sent off to the UK Australia Embassy in Sydney. He couldn't send his passport off as obviously he needed to get back to Tonga the following day. So he gave him a large envelope and said to send it all off once he was back home. He did exactly that. It cost him $140 to send it!!!! And it still took a week to get there. I was tracking it from here. Thankfully it had got there. So all we needed to do now was wait on a decision. Up to 60 working days. That took us to the 13th June. Cool, surely with our situation they'll make this quick.
It was May and we still hadn't heard anything. I called Immigration myself. £1.47 per minute it costs to speak to someone. They couldn't give or tell me any information on the status of Paul's visa. Smart. I'm only his Wife, raising his child without him, trying to get him back. I was getting emails as I'd emailed them previously. £5.48 it costs to send an email to Immigration then if its about the same case its no further cost. I got an email back to say his Visa was awaiting a decision. There was no rush here clearly. They knew everything about us. They literally had our lives in front of them. A cover letter to say how me and Milla would be cared for by my parents until Paul came back and started his job and we were able to get our own place. Paul saying how hurt and upset he feels about being pulled away from his Daughter and Wife and how these are the most important times to be a father. Watching your child grow and learn. The list goes on.
Now in May and still nothing. I sent an email to Theresa May. I got a reply from her admin worker. Asking for some more details, Visa Reference, full name etc and that he would pass the following information onto the correct Immigration department. I got an email back. I was getting that many emails off different people because I was frantic and wanted answers. I had emailed loads but it was very rare that you'd get a reply from the same person you were once emailing. So dysfunctional. We didn't seem to be getting anywhere. Then the week before we were supposed to have our decision Paul got an email off a woman from Sheffield Embassy to say they hadn't received my Dad's sponsor details. He assured her that they were all sent along with the visa application to Sydney and that he had proof of postage. She asked for that so Paul sent her it. He got an email back to confirm the documents had been found and faxed over to Sheffield and sorry for the delay. The day after that he received an email to say his application was in the hands of the decision maker. All this waiting, all these weeks, months finally felt like they were coming to an end.
In this time my Nannie was in a terrible state in hospital, really really ill. Luckily she made a miraculous recovery. She's doing great now. But my Grandma down in Cheshire passed away suddenly. My heart is broken. So many emotions, I couldn't control them. I was exhausted. Trying to hold everything together for Paul and Milla's sake. Surely we're due some good news. I needed to get away. I went and spent some time down at Grandma's with Milla and my Dad. Her house is my happy place. I lived there with her before I went to Australia. I walked in for the first time and she wasn't sat in her chair. I broke down. I was a mess. I didn't want my Dad to see me so upset as this was an awful time for him. His one Mum, her only Son. I put Milla down on the floor. She sat looking confused staring at my Grandma's chair, babbling away to herself. Jeeeeez, this was awful. We stayed for two nights then I went back to work for two weeks before her funeral. Her only Brother was in Canada visiting his son and he wouldn't be back until the 1st July. Her funeral was the 2nd.
I called immigration so many times. One time it cost me £20 and I spoke to a Jamaican man who couldn't understand what I was saying and I couldn't understand what he was saying. He wanted Paul's IHS number. I said I haven't got that. He would gibe out any more information as I didn't have it. I called the next day and spoke to an English man. I was thrilled. I explained I needed this IHS number and the previous guy wouldn't give me it and the guy said he would send it back out to Paul via email. He's still waiting for that email. Two weeks before my Grandma's funeral I called Immigration AGAIN and spoke to a girl who I'd actually spoken to the week before as it was passed the 13th June and we still hadn't heard anything and she said she would send like a reminder to hurry things a long. I told her we still hadn't heard and she remembered me. I told her in a nut shell the situation and she said "He hasn't seen his baby since the 2nd February!!!!! That is disgusting!" I got upset on the phone and said he needed to be home for a family bereavement. We spoke for a short while and she said she would cancel my last enquiry as it still hadn't been looked at put it through as urgent. The following day I was at work and I go a message off Paul to say he had got an email. He forwarded it onto me and it said-
A decision was made on your application on 18th June 2019 and you will be contacted shortly regarding the return of your documents.
I felt physically sick! Why haven't they told us if its a yes or a no! How long is this going to take to get to him? Does this mean its a yes? Are the documents the return of his documents? Does this mean the documents are saying its been refused and why?
I googled How long does it take to get your documents back after applying for a visa. Up to two weeks was the answer for most. Is he going to get his passport and the visa will be stamped in it? I was so so excited. We could literally be back together in a couple of weeks. Even though I had negative thoughts I tried to stay positive. The Law of Attraction and all that.
His Visa was done and submitted online on the 21st March. £1,300 it cost. He then had to make an appointment for Fiji Uk Embassy as that was the closest one to Tonga. He did that, then I booked him a flight. He would stay with family for two nights. $600 for a return flight which took 2 hours to get there. Off he went. He had already filled in his paper visa and collected all evidence. Marriage certificate, birth certificates, cover letters, proof of address, employment contract, the list goes on. He had a file full and all the evidence and the evidence for my Dad to sponsor him. Utility bills, proof of earnings etc. He then had to do his Biometrics (photo and finger prints). He was in that appointment 10 minutes!! All this money and effort for a 10minute appointment! Ridiculous. The guy said right well I'll get all this sent off to the UK Australia Embassy in Sydney. He couldn't send his passport off as obviously he needed to get back to Tonga the following day. So he gave him a large envelope and said to send it all off once he was back home. He did exactly that. It cost him $140 to send it!!!! And it still took a week to get there. I was tracking it from here. Thankfully it had got there. So all we needed to do now was wait on a decision. Up to 60 working days. That took us to the 13th June. Cool, surely with our situation they'll make this quick.
It was May and we still hadn't heard anything. I called Immigration myself. £1.47 per minute it costs to speak to someone. They couldn't give or tell me any information on the status of Paul's visa. Smart. I'm only his Wife, raising his child without him, trying to get him back. I was getting emails as I'd emailed them previously. £5.48 it costs to send an email to Immigration then if its about the same case its no further cost. I got an email back to say his Visa was awaiting a decision. There was no rush here clearly. They knew everything about us. They literally had our lives in front of them. A cover letter to say how me and Milla would be cared for by my parents until Paul came back and started his job and we were able to get our own place. Paul saying how hurt and upset he feels about being pulled away from his Daughter and Wife and how these are the most important times to be a father. Watching your child grow and learn. The list goes on.
Now in May and still nothing. I sent an email to Theresa May. I got a reply from her admin worker. Asking for some more details, Visa Reference, full name etc and that he would pass the following information onto the correct Immigration department. I got an email back. I was getting that many emails off different people because I was frantic and wanted answers. I had emailed loads but it was very rare that you'd get a reply from the same person you were once emailing. So dysfunctional. We didn't seem to be getting anywhere. Then the week before we were supposed to have our decision Paul got an email off a woman from Sheffield Embassy to say they hadn't received my Dad's sponsor details. He assured her that they were all sent along with the visa application to Sydney and that he had proof of postage. She asked for that so Paul sent her it. He got an email back to confirm the documents had been found and faxed over to Sheffield and sorry for the delay. The day after that he received an email to say his application was in the hands of the decision maker. All this waiting, all these weeks, months finally felt like they were coming to an end.
In this time my Nannie was in a terrible state in hospital, really really ill. Luckily she made a miraculous recovery. She's doing great now. But my Grandma down in Cheshire passed away suddenly. My heart is broken. So many emotions, I couldn't control them. I was exhausted. Trying to hold everything together for Paul and Milla's sake. Surely we're due some good news. I needed to get away. I went and spent some time down at Grandma's with Milla and my Dad. Her house is my happy place. I lived there with her before I went to Australia. I walked in for the first time and she wasn't sat in her chair. I broke down. I was a mess. I didn't want my Dad to see me so upset as this was an awful time for him. His one Mum, her only Son. I put Milla down on the floor. She sat looking confused staring at my Grandma's chair, babbling away to herself. Jeeeeez, this was awful. We stayed for two nights then I went back to work for two weeks before her funeral. Her only Brother was in Canada visiting his son and he wouldn't be back until the 1st July. Her funeral was the 2nd.
I called immigration so many times. One time it cost me £20 and I spoke to a Jamaican man who couldn't understand what I was saying and I couldn't understand what he was saying. He wanted Paul's IHS number. I said I haven't got that. He would gibe out any more information as I didn't have it. I called the next day and spoke to an English man. I was thrilled. I explained I needed this IHS number and the previous guy wouldn't give me it and the guy said he would send it back out to Paul via email. He's still waiting for that email. Two weeks before my Grandma's funeral I called Immigration AGAIN and spoke to a girl who I'd actually spoken to the week before as it was passed the 13th June and we still hadn't heard anything and she said she would send like a reminder to hurry things a long. I told her we still hadn't heard and she remembered me. I told her in a nut shell the situation and she said "He hasn't seen his baby since the 2nd February!!!!! That is disgusting!" I got upset on the phone and said he needed to be home for a family bereavement. We spoke for a short while and she said she would cancel my last enquiry as it still hadn't been looked at put it through as urgent. The following day I was at work and I go a message off Paul to say he had got an email. He forwarded it onto me and it said-
A decision was made on your application on 18th June 2019 and you will be contacted shortly regarding the return of your documents.
I felt physically sick! Why haven't they told us if its a yes or a no! How long is this going to take to get to him? Does this mean its a yes? Are the documents the return of his documents? Does this mean the documents are saying its been refused and why?
I googled How long does it take to get your documents back after applying for a visa. Up to two weeks was the answer for most. Is he going to get his passport and the visa will be stamped in it? I was so so excited. We could literally be back together in a couple of weeks. Even though I had negative thoughts I tried to stay positive. The Law of Attraction and all that.
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