Our last days as a 3

We have made some wonderful memories. Christmas was great and we truly showed Paul how us Brits do it. On Christmas Eve we left a carrot on the door step for Rudolph, a mince pie and a glass of red for Santa and we even sprinkled Reindeer food on the decking so he could find his way. It was a special Christmas. But still this whole leaving thing was hovering over us like a big dark cloud. We went fishing on Whitehaven Harbour. Seeing Paul fish was something else. He had a Heineken bottle attached to a long piece of wire with a weight and hook at the end with his bait on. 7 fish he caught in an hour!! We took Milla for her first swim. She absolutely loved it! We spent New Years Eve in with my Mam, Dad, Brother and his kids as his partner was on night shift. Just a nice chilled night. I don't really like doing anything on New Years Eve but my favourite thing to do is watch Joules Holland. We discovered the lovely Lowes Water and met a lovely lady with her Dog, Lowey named after the lake. She was now on her own as her Husband had sadly passed away a few years before. She lived down south and sold up and came to live in Cumbria. Her favourite place. My bestest Lauren who I met in Australia came home for a month over Christmas. Her Kewi Boyfriend Matt came over too and we met them at Grasmere. Another one of my fave places. It was sooooooooooo good to see her and Matt just bounce off each other. I was delighted to see how good she was doing and also looked. We also visited Rydal Caves. That was a good adventure. It was awesome. We spent a lot of time at our dear friends Daniel and David'. They have looked after us so much and I don't know what we'd do without them. So thank you you two🧡 I took Paul to Wasdale and we had an amazing Sunday Lunch at The Strands. We went for Afternoon Tea at Lingla Cafe in Frizington. Another little gem. We went to Buttermere and Paul danced on the icy puddles. We met a lovely little couple from The Wirral who were here on holiday. I love meeting new people. I believe it makes a massive difference to your life. The Rugby lads had a get together in the Club after Paul's last match. They presented him with a Rugby shirt with his name printed on the back and made him man of the match. He was so proud and it was very emotional. We had our last family meal at The Parkside. That was really nice. Paul also bought all cards for me that I'd be needing while he was away. Mothers Day, my Birthday, Valentines Day. That was a bit sad watching him write them out. The pain I was feeling let alone him was horrific. I can't even explain because I'd never felt this before. How were we ever going to get through this. Apart for at least 3 months! This is how long it can take. Up to 60 working days. Paul not seeing Milla grow and achieve. It was soul destroying.

Shittest news ever!

We had the most amazing months with our Girl. The best job ever! So overwhelmed with love. We said we would enjoy a couple of months then get applying for a Family Visa as Paul’s Visitor Visa would end on the 4th February. I still haven’t heard from Maternity Pay. I’d applied and knew I wouldn’t get pay from work as I hadn’t been there long enough so I was relying on Statutory Maternity. Milla was 7weeks old and I got a letter to say I wasn’t entitled to maternity. The reason being I had been out of the country 12 months and hadn't paid into the system. Hadn't paid into the system!! I've been paying into the system since I was 16 year old! One year out the country and I'm punished like this. I called the help line and a guy told me (very smugly) if I'd started 4 weeks prior to the date I actually started I'd have been entitled. Smart. I was broke. We were broke. If it wasn’t for my Mam and Dad putting us up I don’t know what we'd have done. Our money was quickly disappearing. Paul wasn’t allowed to work on a Visitor Visa and the only option was for me to go back to work. Come January I was back working Wednesday’s and Fridays. 16hours per week. I couldn’t bare to do anymore as my baby girl was so so tiny and this just wasn’t fair. Luckily I had Paul and he had her while I went to make a living. We were advised to apply for Universal Credits. But were told Paul wouldn’t be able to claim anything as he wasn’t a citizen. This was understandable.  We had two separate interviews at the job centre. Citizenship interviews. Ohhhhh really! There is my BRITISH passport. Ridiculous. Never mind. Rules are rules. Days later I’d been approved. I AM a British Citizen. Hallelujah! I started getting this at the very end of November. It just covered my bills but I was just so grateful to get at least something. Work was very very hard. Well it wasn’t, I love my job but it was very hard leaving my girl. I felt like I’d been robbed. My time off with her was cut very short. I just had to get on with it. My Universal Credits weren’t affected as I was only working 16 hours.
We started to make an online application for a Spouse Visa. Very long winded. Lots of evidence to get together. Marriage certificate, proof of address, how long we’d been together, Milla’s Birth Certificate, photos, proof, proof and more proof. The list goes on. As we went to submit it at the end of November something told me not to do it. My sister in-law had a Filipino friend. She spoke to her as she and her partner had applied for the same visa. We went round to their home and they made us dinner. It was delish. We had a good crack and they had used an Immigration agent based in London who was also a Filipino. They called her and put her on loud speaker. She spoke to me and I told her Paul was on a Visitor Visa. Right away she said “Ohh he’ll have to go back.” “What do you mean, he’ll have to go back?” I replied with watery eyes. “Yes he’ll have to either go back home or at least leave the country. The rules are rules” Tears we’re streaming down my face. I felt like someone had stabbed me in the stomach. Paul couldn’t speak. My sister in-law had watery eyes and I just kept looking at Paul whilst he was holding our tiny baby girl while she was sleeping. She explained that when on a visitor visa you can't apply to extend because you are just here on a Visit, like a holiday. I understood but it didn't make sense, especially with our circumstances. (and for the gossipers that said he's been deported, you couldn't be more wrong). This is why I'm writing this blog. Rules needs to change for each individual case.
My heart was broken. We left and went home to my Mam and Dad and explained. We just had to get on with it. We all decided that we would enjoy Christmas. Our first as parents and Paul's first in England. He'd never had a cold Christmas. He was really looking forward to it. And then we would look at flights.

Baby Niua

On the Thursday 27th September 2018 at 14.59pm  I gave birth (via an emergency c-section) to a beautiful baby Girl💖 Milla Ilisapesi (Elizabeth) Niua weighing in at 6 pound 13 and a half ounces. (I will talk more about my labour experience at a later date.) We were parents!! To this tiny little dot that was meant to be HUGE! She was just perfect and we were both thrilled. Cried and hugged her. She had to be taken before I held her. That was strange. I just wanted her but I was so calm and overwhelmed with the whole amazing experience.
I was in hospital for 4days afterwards (again I'll talk about this at a later date. I just want to get up to speed with this process) Here are a few photos.......... 👪

Our first walk. 5days old💖

4 Generations.